Wouldn’t it be nice.

Whenever I’m an emotional wreck (which is usually around this time in my cycle, when AF is set to arrive…and lets face it, that progesterone isn’t helping my mood swings either) I swear off ever trying to get pregnant again. I cry, I feel sorry for myself, I wish things were different. Today I thought to myself, “This is BULLSHIT. I should be 7 months pregnant right now, not STILL trying to get (and fucking STAY) pregnant. This is not fair!”

So I’m guessing I will get my period tomorrow, maybe the next day. Just for fun, I decided to see what my due date would be if by some miracle I got  pregnant this next cycle.

October 26th.

My 30th birthday.

A sign?

Who knows. But that would be a really, really amazing birthday present.


6 thoughts on “Wouldn’t it be nice.

  1. This letdown is killer each month. I hate it. And I hate when people say, “Oh just let it happen and stop stressing about it!” If it were that easy….

  2. I get it, I wish I could say it will get easier but it probably never does. After the stress of getting pg then there’s the stress of staying that way, then there’s the stess of being pg, then of having the child, raising the child etc. etc. etc.

    All you can do is take comfort in whatever and whoever you can. Lean on us, your DH, and whoever else you can.

    Sending thoughts and prayers your way…

    • That’s the thing that makes me the most angry, I think. I’ll never again get to experience the complete elation of finding out that I’m pregnant. Because in that same moment, I will be completely terrified that I will lose it again.

      Thank you for your thoughts and prayers — and know that I’m pulling for you too! 🙂

  3. I totally know what you mean. Every month I get my period I think “Well, I should be [x] months along and here were are not even pregnant again yet.

    We go through 2 weeks of living like we’re pregnant just in case we are only to be devastated to find out it’s not in the cards for us this month.

    It sucks.

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