I’m SO over it.

I can’t remember if I’ve posted on the blog about my boss or not. To put it simply, she’s crazy. I spend most of my days stressing about whether or not she’s mad at me for something (and that something is usually really NOTHING, she’s just crazy.) I had my review several months back, and it was GLOWING. I’ve never gotten such a great review. A week later, I had to call out for the day because Maddie’s daycare provider was sick. She was perfectly nice about it on the phone, told me not to worry about it and she’d see me the next day. Well, the next day came, and she pulled me into her office and ripped me a new one. Told me that no one in the department could could on me for anything, that I didn’t take my job seriously, that I was worthless as an employee. She went on to tell me I was no longer allowed to take any days off, to go to any doctors appointments, etc. I was SO pissed, so LIVID, that I literally almost quit then and there.

This week, I was browsing the open positions on our company’s website. I came across one that interested me, and after much internal debate, I decided to apply for it. The next day, I got a call from the HR manager wanting to set up an interview. YES!!! After some more internal debate and a conversation with my cousin, who is a big-wig HR exec for Target, I decided I needed to tell my boss about the interview, just to be up front and honest with her (the company encouarages this as well).

So, this morning, after psyching myself up, I went in to her and told her the news. Before I could even continue, she said to me, “Well, I’m glad, because this really isn’t working out anymore anyway.”

Um…WHAT? Are you fucking KIDDING ME!? I cannot. believe. she. said. that. How inappropriate! How unprofessional! I was appalled.  First of all, I come to work EVERY DAY. I do my job and then some (not that there’s much to it). I make any appointment my have for over my lunch hour so I don’t have to miss any work. SHE IS CRAZY!

So now, I”m stressed. If I don’t get this job, she is going to make my life a living hell. I would not put it past her to find any reason she can to fire me. I am terrified of that happening.

On top of that, I can’t decide if I should tell my could-be-manager, the one I’m interviewing with, that I’m pregnant. On the one hand, I know that no matter how much they say they won’t discrimnate because I’m pregnant, nine times out of ten they will choose the non-pregnant candidate instead. On the other, I don’t want them to feel like I was dishonest or sneaky in not telling them. HR cousin says don’t tell, but I’m not so sure. I think that if I was interview for a different company altogether, I would keep it quiet. But because this is an internal position, and because so many people at work already know, I feel like keeping it a secret will appear dishonest.

UGH. I am so stressed.

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3 thoughts on “I’m SO over it.

  1. My thoughts are you and your family are first and they can not legally ask you if you are pregnant. I would not tell. I manage a lot of people (11) and did hire a barely pregnant woman once, she did not tell me. I was not really bothered that she didn’t probably because she did such a good job.

    If it was me I would want to get away from crazy boss and so I think I would not tell. If I got the job I would do a damn good job and try to be flexible during maternity leave (like maybe check emails or be willing to take (occasional) emergency calls). Not sure what your new job is so don’t know if that applies.

    Just make the best decision with the info you have for your family. You don’t owe them anything and many (not all) companies look out for themselves first.

    BTW- I try really hard to have a family friendly work environment because why make people’s lives miserable and sh*t happens.

    Good luck, let us know what you decide.

    • Thank you so much for the advice. I’m leaning more towards the “don’t tell” side of things, so I’m thinking that’s how it’s going to go. I’ll feel it out, of course, and I suppose it’s entirely possible that they already know I’m pregnant, but until necessary, I think I’m going to keep it to myself.

  2. Congrats on the interview! I’m with Nicole and your cousin–don’t tell! My father in law was the head of HR for a big company and he flat out said that most managers would discriminate against you and just say it was for some other reason (lack of work experience, etc.). Of course if the interviewer brings it up you’ll have to mention it, but I wouldn’t volunteer the information.

    Best of luck! I hope you’re able to get away from your insane boss!

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